Ito, R. et al
First contact with life from Venus ended in tragedy today, as a visitor from our planetary neighbour was sublimated by the intense heat of it’s point of arrival, Phoenix Arizona.
“It really caught us by surprise,” said NASA scientist Wade Gadiot, mopping his brow for the 31st time since the interview began. “The spaceship approached the agreed upon landing site and the bridge came out like you would’ve expected. Then one of the extra-terrestrials took two steps into the sun and then turned into a cloud of dust.”
Gadiot said the only thing indicating the extraterrestrial evaporated rather than left abruptly was a puddle of steaming sludge staining the road.
“We’re all really disappointed, especially those of us hoping to that mankind’s first discussion with alien life form would consist of more than what we can only assume was a raspy call for water.”
The visitor’s untimely demise has led to some discussion about whether or not the state of Arizona has become too hot to allow visitors from other planets. Phoenix Mayor Kate Gallego states that tourists from out of planet should make sure their bodies can handle the climate before making the trip.
“The planet Venus can reach temperatures of 900 degrees Fahrenheit, which is about the equivalent of a cloudy day in Arizona. Maybe tourists from Mercury won’t mind, but Venusians should consider Nevada instead.”
At press time, the surviving alien visitors were currently sitting in their craft with the windows open and the AC on, planning on departing the planet as soon as the steering wheel stopped being too hot to touch.
