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November 5, 2024

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Chemistry

Theoretical Physicists Confirm Earth Is Neither Flat Nor Round, But A Series Of Quantized Earth Orbitals
Biology

Punk Snake Gets Tongue Unforked
Biology

Lab Rats Find That 1 In 3 Researchers Could Be A LITTLE More Gentle
Medicine

First Year Psych Student Confidently Diagnoses Friend With Disorder She Just Learned Existed
Chemistry

Pre-Med Student Tearfully Deletes “Aspiring Doctor 🩺” From Instagram Bio After First Organic Chemistry Midterm

Lab Run by AI Fails the Turing Test After All Students Report That They Are Happy

October 18, 2024

PPE “Kinda Optional” In This Lab Reports Scarred, Fluorescent Lab Technician

October 17, 2024

Oops! I Accidentally Submitted To A Predatory Journal And Now It’s Hunting Me For Sport

October 16, 2024

Unlabeled Bottle in Chemistry Lab “Definitely Acid of Some Kind” According to Undergrad Whose Hands Are Burning

October 15, 2024

Competitive Faculty Position Selection Process Includes Chalk Talk, Brutal Gladiator-Style Combat

October 11, 2024

First Year Psych Student Confidently Diagnoses Friend With Disorder She Just Learned Existed

October 10, 2024

she has now diagnosed as many mental illnesses in the past month that would take a trained psychologist at least a decade

Latest News & Views

Hottie Alert! The James Webb Telescope Just Found A New Heavenly Body That Is Absolutely Jacked

September 14, 2024

Marine Biologists Confirm Mermaid That Washed Up On Shore Had Stomach Full Of Thing-A-Ma-Bobs

September 13, 2024

God Not Sure How to Tell Humanity That E. Coli Is The Species Made in His Own Image

Latest Research

PPE “Kinda Optional” In This Lab Reports Scarred, Fluorescent Lab Technician

October 17, 2024

Oops! I Accidentally Submitted To A Predatory Journal And Now It’s Hunting Me For Sport

October 16, 2024

Competitive Faculty Position Selection Process Includes Chalk Talk, Brutal Gladiator-Style Combat

October 11, 2024

More dnatured

Vengeful Gods Growing Increasingly Frustrated That Climate Change Receiving All The Credit For Their Wrath And Smiting

Yas Queen! Climate Scientists Say We Should Prepare For An Entire Hot Girl Century!!!

Grad Student Becomes Lab’s Go-To Graphic Designer After Making Half-Decent Image In Powerpoint

Baby Scientists Discussing Possibility Of Mommy Just Being Behind Hands

Lab Libs! Researchers Have Uncovered A Link Between [Something You Love] And [The Worst Thing You Can Think Of]

Sparrow Bragging About T-Rex Ancestry Actually Descended From Some Bitch-Ass Lizard

A local sparrow was stunned after a DNA test revealed that 90% of his genetics are from something called a “Tonga Ground Skink” and not from a Tyrannosaurus rex, as his family has claimed for generations.

QUIZ: Should We Try To Solve The Climate Crisis Or Just Let A Few People Make As Much Money As Possible In The Little Time We Have Left?

Mitochondria Confirm They’re Also The Power Bottom Of The Cell

Super Bacteria Mock New Antibiotics By Spelling Out “That All You Got?” Under Microscope

The super bacteria call the microbiologist’s attempts at assassinating their colony “pathetic”

Aww! This New Line of Bacteria Scented Candles Will Make Your Place Smell Just Like The Warm Room That Hasn’t Been Cleaned In Decades

Quiet Quitting? This Line Of Antibiotics Stopped Working!

Is It A Mass Extinction Or Is God Calling All The Cuties Home?

Killer Asteroid’s Lawyer Gets Charges Reduced To Meteoroid Manslaughter

September 12, 2023

Alien From Venus Evaporates After One Minute In Phoenix, Arizona

August 24, 2023

Awesome! These Cell Cultures Waited Until Friday at 5pm to Need Passaging

Cool! Snakes Tired of Being Poached for Boots Are Evolving Skin To Look Cheap and Tasteless

Experimental Psychology Professor Assigns 500 Page Essay On Sleep Deprivation Due Tomorrow

Wow! This Newly Discovered Dinosaur Was Just Elected Nation’s Youngest Senator

Lonely Perseverance Rover Fires Up Tinder To Begin Search Signs of Martian Love Life

Scientists Confirm Sex With A Neanderthal Would Have Been Fucking Mind-blowing

Oops! Offshore Wind Farm Accidentally Spills Millions Of Gallons of Wind Into The Ocean

Protocol: How To Use Data Science To Prove Your Roommate Is Slacking On Dishes

February 7, 2021

Pandas Roll in Horse Feces to Keep Warm, Announce Zoo Koalas, Snickering

February 2, 2021

Clinically Depressed Man Can’t Wait to Return to Pre-COVID Lifestyle of Avoiding Human Contact and Rarely Leaving Home

February 1, 2021

Whoopsie! Researcher Accidentally Submits Paper To Science Total Landscaping

November 17, 2020

Lazy Cell Still Gets Mom To Fold Its Proteins

October 18, 2020

Retro! This Hipster Chemist Only Pipettes By Mouth And Now He Is Very Sick

October 5, 2020

Grad Student Desperate For Feedback Thrilled To Receive “K.” From Supervisor After Just 3 Months

September 27, 2020

Whoops! This Research Chemist Forgot To Add “But Not For Drugs” At The End Of Their Google Search And Now They’re On A Watch List

September 15, 2020

Bankrupt Company Forced To Sell Customer’s Data Just To Afford Executive Bonuses

August 27, 2020

Scientific Baby Names To Help Your Newborn Get Noticed By The Ivy League

August 24, 2020

Study Confirms Americans Will Believe Anything Said By People Wearing White Coats, As Long As They’re Not Doctors Or Scientists

August 12, 2020

Scientists Agree To Only Play God With Lifeforms That Were Likely To Worship Them Anyways

Open Letter From A Lab Rat: Please Remove The Tumour You Genetically Engineered Into My Anus And Explain Yourselves

How To Power Through A Pandemic Because Capitalism Demands It

Whoa! This New Fluorescent Antibody Is Just As Dim As The Previous One, But Twice As Expensive!

Most cited

New Book On Dunning-Kruger Effect Includes Complementary Mirror

Grad Student Who Used Any Excuse To Avoid Lab Work Now Reminiscing About All The Experiments They Could Be Doing

Wow! This Overachieving Academic Published AND Perished

“We Condemn Racism In All Forms,” Says University Founded By Racists That Still Has Buildings Named After Notorious Racists

Latest Issue

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Yas Queen! Climate Scientists Say We Should Prepare For An Entire Hot Girl Century!!!

July 29, 2024
“I’m Gonna be More Proactive and Hardworking!” Announces Grad Student About to Screw Everything Up

November 10, 2021
OpEd: If Marie Curie is Such a Feminist Icon, Then Why Did the Element She Discover Poison All Those Women at the Watch Factory?

March 28, 2024
Parents Demand Recall After Child Who Read ‘Quantum Physics For Babies’ Still Can’t Explain String Theory

May 13, 2020
Theoretical Physicist Travels Back In Time To Persuade Younger Self To Go Into The Trades

October 1, 2019
Alcoholic Goldfish Drinks To Forget Harrowing Last Four Seconds

June 20, 2019
How To Power Through Seasonal Depression Because Capitalism Demands It

January 19, 2020
Cool! This Bottle Of Reagent Has Been In The Lab So Long It Just Received Tenure

May 9, 2020
Institutional Animal Welfare Group Proposes Humane Endpoints for Ph.D. Students

September 19, 2024
Tragic! Study On The Negative Psychological Effects Of Using Social Media Has Only Received Six Likes

April 8, 2021
Feminist Heroes! NASA Releases Stunning New Photos Of Mars Without Makeup

April 7, 2019
Protocol: How To Passive-Aggressively Let Undergrads Know There Is A CORRECT Way To Take Pipette Tips From The Box

June 14, 2024
God Not Sure How to Tell Humanity That E. Coli Is The Species Made in His Own Image

August 4, 2024
Wow! This Overachieving Academic Published AND Perished

February 4, 2020

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dnatured is a satirical scientific journal with impact factor 69. We strive to publish the most paper cutting scientific research, protocols and news.

Copyright 2019

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